When Anthony Ashdown met Jake, their shared love of nerd culture felt revolutionary. Then Jake recited a line from The Golden Girls

Picture it. Sydney. 2015. I had weathered a nasty breakup the previous year. I had often compromised a lot of who I was and what I enjoyed to keep the other person happy. Post-breakup, I decided I would never change who I was for anyone else ever again.

I got on the apps and matched with Jake, a handsome young man 10 years younger than me. We chatted on Grindr and planned to meet for coffee and then spend the afternoon at Cronulla beach.

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